So … the exact formatting for this poem didn’t transfer and I’m really irritated by it. I had put so much into this poem, time and blood mostly, and now the spacing is all wrong.
I did my best to fix it. At least I tried harder than I did last time.
But … the words are still the same. I guess that’s the important part of poetry.
Regardless, I bet you already know what’s about to go down.
I No Longer Resent My Hometown College // For Shayla Part 2 // D A Y A F T E R V A L E N T I N E ‘ S D A Y
Today i kissed the
s t i l l n e s s left in the spaces
she once occupied. Day after
V A L E N T I N E ‘ S D A Y
& i’m still not used to the
attention my family gives me
without her here. Mortality is a
f ra g ile
thing & the death of a teen
reminds that i could go with the
q u i c k s l i p of a f l a t l i n e.
The stillness I kissed
left a sour dusting on my
cheek, trailing in the form of
a water drop, from
eye to chin.
But i c a n ’ t
k e e p t h i n k i n g about this
when i’m expected to keep up
t h e h a r d w o r k
scholarships depend on a 3.0
I think I want to double major.
Italian? Anthropology? Classical studies would be the most fun.
G o d.
What would She want to study?
Sometimes, i catch my reflection.
Instead of a dark green hazel void
i see her blue.
i should dye my hair blonde.
i bought a boy some coffee today
because i couldn’t buy any for her.
Sometimes I can’t believe I was only two years older when I stood beside her hospital bed.
i offered to buy my aunt
when she texted me
H A P P Y V A L E N T I N E ‘ S D A Y
L O V E A N D M I S S Y O U
she’s never texted me before
s h a y l a ‘s t h i r d w e e k a t t h e h o s p i t a l
i guess you could say
emotion moved me to offer.
i told someone about Shayla today,
only i pretended she was still alive
for the sake of pleasant small talk.
making friends is hard.
Day After Valentine’s Day
why is this so hard.
i hope the boy i bought
coffee for knew i was flirting.
The Prettiest Distraction Ever Seen
Friend from Chicago
came to visit. marriage in her family
tomorrow—but she’s never met the bride.
She promised to buy dinner—plus my roommate
makes three. thoughts are elsewhere—neither seem to
mind. i gave her my fake leather jacket. i don’t want it anymore.
i don’t want anything anymore.
Thanks for reading this, you guys. It really means a lot to me to have all of this support.
I hope you all have wonderful nights, free of bad dreams. ❤